Tuesday, January 22, 2019

Home Invasion!











A raging beast smashed his way through my front door and into the house, wielding a heavy ax.

Running to investigate, I had little time to react before he took a swing. He mistakenly thought I was properly dispatched when he hacked open my head, scalp to chin.

No dummy, I remembered the Planarian worms I dissected in summer school all those years ago...how they grew two heads when similarly split.

I followed their lead.

Now with two heads and four eyes, I offered the hacker my right arm, then my left. He hacked, I regenerated...times two.

It's true that two heads are better than one, and four arms better yet.


I out-hacked the hacker at his own game, turned the tide of battle, dispatched him with extreme prejudice, and probably saved thousands of fellow townspeople from a similar fate.


Who would have thought those summer school classes could be such a life-saver all these years later?


Now I'm just worried about having to cut extra arm holes into my work shirts.


Fortunately, I already own plenty of hats.









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