Dear Doctor...

Dear Doctor,

I won't be back to see you again and feel it's only fair to tell you why. It's not because I moved out of town or wanted to try a different doctor. It's because you drove me away.

Initially I started to see you in need of a GP. That was some...what, two or three years ago? My wife told me that you had a reputation for being good at your job, and that has generally proven to be true. But here's the rub: In dealing with people, it would be best for yourself and for your patients if you put in some serious work in developing people skills. OK, you've got the analysis covered. You're good with identifying physical health concerns and addressing them. But when it comes to the people part, you seem to be both clueless and lacking.

Yes, I know if I want entertainment, I should go to a movie, or Vegas. It's not that. It's about you paying more attention to your laptop than you do to me. At our last exam you barely looked up from your keyboard. I made a few jokes in an effort to lighten the mood but you not only didn't laugh or smile, you didn't even acknowledge that I had spoken. It's that way every time. You may be the most humorless man I know. An appointment with you feels about as intimate as a drive through the car wash. Perhaps you're the most skilled GP in all of Florida, but I would rather see a doctor with average skills who is pleasant to be around and makes me feel like he cares about me as a patient and as a person. I really get the impression that if I dropped dead on the floor in front of you, that would simply be an opportunity for you to update my charts and move on to your next patient.

Helping people to feel good about themselves and about their time with you is huge. People skills may be the single most important of all of our personal tools as we make our way through this blink of an eye we call life. All human interaction can be made better with a liberal dose. Husbands, wives, sons, daughters, employees, employers...all greatly improve their odds of getting what they want in life if they understand just how important it is that they do their best to help others get what they want and to help them to be the best they can be...and feel good about it. Although you seem to feel that humor and sincere interaction with your patients is frivolous or beneath you, I would maintain that it is crucial, right up there with oxygen.

I heard a line in a movie once about a sour, humorless guy of whom one friend said to the other: " That guy needs a joint and a blowjob more than anyone I know." That's you.

None of this is intended to be a personal attack. No offense, just business. I believe you operate best that way.

Happy Holidays!

Hugh Haller

Un-Schooling...

This is one of the main reasons Carla home-schooled Ruth & Hannah. Over time she pulled me into acceptance and then to full support and encouragement. Home-schooling (un-schooling for us) isn't for everyone but it sure worked well with our two girls.

Jamey Johnson playing balls out honky tonk in the kitchen accompanied by fresh garlic, thyme, oregano, rosemary, parsley, ground black pepper, onions, carrots, tomato paste beef stock, a couple of bay leaves, and a bottle of dry red wine. Oh, and 6 pounds of beef short ribs. Three hours away from braised ambrosia...ribs that are “unstoppably, almost obscenely good”... But now for some thick black coffee, a B12 shot, and a little gym time to help me justify bad behavior later in the day...

Opposites Attract

I'm very stable, routine in my vices and virtues, a planner, a homebody, boring. Carla lives in the moment with no concept of time and no concern for social protocol. If I didn't fill her pockets with smooth stones, she would spin off into space...and I would...just...shut...down.

Military moms under attack for breastfeeding in uniform...

This picture is stupid, it's not anything you would see, it's not representative of real Moms out there. That said, women have breasts to feed their babies. If men in our culture want to prevent the possibility of seeing a bit of a woman's breast because it could make them crazy, tough. It's just another version of saying that a rape victim “asked for it” because she dressed in brief clothing. That's bullshit. We've lost perspective and created a culture that worships silicone artificiality and profits from selling baby formula to third world countries. Breast feeding in private or public is a beautiful, natural, nourishing, loving act worthy of respect and reverence. For those who think it is something other than that: grow up.

The Ultimate Scam

I was raised “High Episcopalian”singing in a much acclaimed choir of men and boys that generated my first regular paycheck. Yes, they paid us kids...we sang for the Queen in Westminster Abbey, made several albums... I loved it, even though it took up 3 nights a week and long hours on Sundays. But the church, the priests...just turned me off to the blatant outrage of the scam they were perpetuating...a bunch of loosers, all of them. Too weak to survive in the real world . Closet pedophiles, drunks, liars...they stole the collection monies, they pontificated and acted superior, preaching against everything they were themselves...just terrible people. I know they aren't all like that but when anyone starts wielding that sword of guilt & superstition...I get a bit hostile. Lets ask the Pope, for instance:“How dare you? How dare you wear those expensive clothes and strut around all over the globe as CEO of a tax free corporation that is the largest land-holder of the most expensive real estate in the world?" And then vomit out your spin on Jesus and humility...and the need for all of us to fall to our knees with overwhelming guilt for breathing air? What's the inevitable solution? (drum roll ) yes, it's to give you money!!! I don't think so. In case you haven't noticed, a lot of things in our society are changing quickly, very quickly, it's all thanks to the electronic highway we ride these days. It so greatly accelerates the evolution. You can no longer hide so comfortably in that fungal damp of your complicit shadows anymore...your medieval days, and ways, are numbered.