Friday, September 13, 2013

Rural living & the FPL man...







Ruth & Hannah @ our old house in Ashburn, Va. It was built in 1859, the cabin on the right in 1729. We traced it through 31 owners. After we sold the place to the Catholic Church for too much money, they bull-dozed & buried it without a permit to alter a historic property. The whole area had always been fields & farmlands. Now it's all McMansions with two story foyers designed to impress and an identical showplace thrown up less than ten feet away on either side.

Ohio the wonder dog lived outside and patrolled the perimeter and our surrounding woods. She was the best dog we ever had and always took very good care of the girls. She couldn't have been more gentle with them, but God help the FPL meter reader if he drove onto the property and was foolish enough to get out of his truck without me around to escort him.

I was at work in downtown D.C. one day when the FPL guy intentionally pulled up close to the house,  got out of his truck and sprayed Ohio with pepper spray. Carla saw it happen and came running outside like a pissed off Wolverine wearing nothing more than a T-shirt that didn't even cover her navel... screaming and banishing my Mini 14 semi-auto with a 30 round clip. It turns out that the only thing scarier than a wildly aggressive German Shepherd mix defending her property is a nude crazy lady with an automatic weapon screaming and running straight at you.

More than a little upset, I called FPL, spoke with the supervisor and had him relay my message to the pepper spraying meter reader that I planned to personally come to his workplace and shoot a full can of pepper spray up his nose. I didn't do that, of course, but he never returned either. FPL bought a good pair of binoculars for the next meter reader so that they could pull into the gravel drive and read the meter through their front windshield. It was a smart solution that assured the continued good health of all meter readers to follow...










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