Follow Your Bliss…

Follow Your Bliss…

Well, that was Joseph Campbell’s advice anyway. And I liked it. I guess he was basically saying that the best way to approach life is to do what turns you on. Follow your passion. So when I look at various peers my age and see numerous and impressive accomplishments from people I admire and who are now at the top of their various fields…I get a bit defensive. OK, I kid that I “never knew what I wanted to be when I grew up…and I still don’t” ha ha…but I‘m too quick to equate that uncertainty with a lack of traditional “success“. In general, we all understand it to mean something …less. I settled, or maybe I did well in something that I never really cared about. But either way, there remains the inference that I need to justify my existence. My old roommate, Eric, designs one of a kind equipment for leveling and laying sod on major sports fields for name teams and colleges. Where did he get that? I guess he followed his bliss for making a better mousetrap and it brought him to the top of his field. Alex is a successful and sought after artist. Clyde is president of the Days Inn chain. Howard went from being an introvert heading out in his little boat to get away form people, stoned, fishing off of the coast of New England…to being the largest supplier of Golden Crab on the East coast. He flies his catch to New York City for shipment to China. They love the stuff and pay top dollar. Brooke came from money and made more. He’s got the picket fence house in Pennsylvania, the house at the Jersey shore, and a condo in Florida. Fucking perfect.

Me? I’ve got a modular home in a middle income development and an unimpressive resume. If someone asks me what I do, they’re asking me to give them a yardstick with which to judge me. If I tell them that I’m a realtor, that is often the end of it. Boring. When I say: “I’m a writer.” the inevitable next question is to ask if I’m published, as if to imply that there is no value in what I do if the answer is “no”. Too often we do judge a book by its cover.

But here’s the thing. The perspective of old age is helping me to erase my own guilt, my lack of having some kind of “thing” or pinnacle that I can point to and say: “I did that.” So now I look at my two daughters, both very successful as people in this world, and take some partial credit: “I did that”. Carla and I just celebrated 35 years together…we did that. Each step along the way, every old picture, releases a flood of great memories that cause me realize that I’ve been following my bliss all along. My passion for my life itself has been my life’s work. I’ve tried to make every day a great day, to celebrate the moment, to stay in balance…and generally, I have. From my perspective, I’ve lived an enviable and sensuous life…from the smell and feel of fat baby feet, dancing in the air when I would gleefully nip at a toe, the wind driven rain in my face trying to shove a cold hand down my flapping jacket collar, a dog that smells…like a dog, doing her eager best to give me a deep French kiss. These things. An intimate moment with a stranger, sharing an insight sparked by similar experiences, Carla’s hand on mine. These things, a lifetime filled with a million of these things. That’s what I wanted all along…and I’ll happily point to this life and say” “I did that”.